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Get into your toga, pour some mustard on your chest, and smash the guitar of a bleeding-heart folk singer if he invades the frat party with somber songs about love. But be sure to wear the Arnette Bluto Sunglasses because the fragments of flying wood, sailing sticky booze, and gooey condiments can be harmful to your health. If you don't protect your eyes, then there's a strong possibility that you won't be able to see the asses you're required to paddle.
